It is possible that you are being emotionally abused without even realizing it

Not all forms of abuse have obvious warning signals or symptoms. Some, such as emotional abuse, might have an effect on you before you even understand what’s going on with you.

There are various sorts of emotional abuse and mistreatment. When you least expect it, it might lurk in the tiniest of whispers. Sometimes it comes all at once, with no warning.

Even if you suspect that you are being abused emotionally, you may not realize it for some time. A few indications may be unnoticed by you. This is a common experience, or you may have been taught to feel that you’re overly sensitive.

It’s important to keep an eye on your connections if you start feeling alone, helpless or useless in them. A bad feeling will never have a valid cause. You deserve to be treated with respect, love, and care. When you know how to see the warning signs in a relationship, you’ll be in a better position to take control of the situation.

Defining what constitutes abuse

Abuse is a term used to describe words and actions that are intended to cause hurt. Physical violence, sexual assault, and other forms of abuse are all possible. Abuse can be a one-time incident, or it can be a long-term pattern of conduct.

As a rule, every form of abuse is deliberate. If you cause harm to another person by your words or actions, this does not necessarily constitute abuse. But doing anything with the goal of harming or exploiting another person is considered abuse.

It’s possible that someone isn’t even aware that their actions are considered abusive. That’s not abusive conduct if the goal of their acts is to exercise control over you or take your authority away from you or manipulate you.

An abuser’s purpose is what determines whether or not the behavior is considered abusive. In other words, someone may say nasty things or push you about with the goal of harming you. They are abusing you even if you aren’t physically wounded by what they do.

Emotional abuse

If you’re being abused, it’s not necessarily obvious. You don’t have to have “evidence” that someone is harming you to know that they are doing so. An emotional abuser utilizes words and nonviolent acts to exercise power and control over you.. The term “mental or psychological abuse” is also used to describe this type of treatment.

To be considered emotionally abused, one must experience any activity that has the potential to hurt one’s emotional well-being. Although you may not feel the effects of what the other person says or does, if their aim was to harm you, it is still considered abuse.

A bad self-image and lack of self-confidence can result from emotional abuse. For example, someone who is emotionally abusive may try to keep you isolated from your family and friends. They may try to keep you from doing activities you like by employing a variety of manipulative techniques.

Emotional oblivion and desertion may also be regarded forms of emotional abuse. Abuse of any kind, even emotional, may progressively erode your feeling of self-worth and independence.

Approximately half of all Americans, according to a nationwide poll conducted more than a decade ago, had been victims of emotional abuse in a romantic relationship. However, a spouse does not have to be the source of emotional abuse. Employees, family members, and friends might also be the source of it.

An example of emotional abuse perpetrated by someone other than a romantic relationship

You’re running late to meet your mother for supper because of something crucial that happened at your place of employment. The first thing she says when you call to let her know is, “It’s alright. You always seem to have something more essential on your mind than I do regardless. “I’m used to it.”

Her sarcastic statement hurts, but you tell yourself that she’s right since you’re rushing late. She hardly acknowledges you when you arrive at the restaurant. Saying farewell, she explains, “I’ll be busy with your brother next week. To say that I’m grateful for him is an understatement.

How to recognize emotional abuse

Consistent emotional abuse is not necessary. One-time events can be followed by recurrences. For the duration of your relationship, you may be subjected to emotional abuse. It is never acceptable. However, long-term abuse habits can have far-reaching psychological effects.

It’s possible to modify a person’s single abusive conduct if they are willing to do so. Abuse habits, on the other hand, have a long-term effect on your mental and emotional health.

Detecting indicators of emotional abuse isn’t always straightforward. In order to be able to see abusive conduct in others, you must first learn how to detect it yourself. However, if you’ve been abused, you may observe changes in your own conduct as well.

Emotional abuse is manifested in 11 distinct ways

You may be the victim of emotional abuse if you exhibit any or all of these characteristics:


Whenever someone does or says anything with the express purpose of making you feel bad about who you are, they are shaming you. Shame might make you feel like you’ve done something wrong.

Expressions such, “Why would you do that?” might be included in this category. Insecurities about one’s appearance, for example, might be the object of such remarks.


“Flipping the switch,” or abruptly blaming you for someone else’s actions and emotions, is one example of emotionally abusive blaming.

I would not have done it had you not made me so furious,” is a kind of blaming that transfers the blame from the abusive person.


Emotional abuse can be caused by harsh or unhelpful criticism. Interrupting you in the middle of a discussion to suggest that you don’t know when to shut talking, for example, can be a kind of psychological abuse.


It’s possible to use guilt as a potent manipulative tool. As soon as you feel like you’ve let someone down, you may alter your conduct in order to avoid that sensation in the future.


Humbling is a common kind of emotional abuse. This can manifest as acts that make you feel less than human, whether they occur in private or in public.


Satirical taunts like “mean jokes” and “name-calling” can be harsh forms of derision.


Feeling irrelevant is a common reaction to having one’s ideas, principles, or opinions brushed aside. You may begin to doubt whether or not your efforts are worthwhile.


People-pleasing conduct can be coerced by false allegations. It’s possible to go to great efforts to be attentive to someone who is accusing you of cheating. If you’re afraid they’ll ask you where you’ve been, you may decide to stop leaving the house altogether.


Neglect occurs when someone’s basic needs aren’t satisfied, whether they’re physical or emotional. Neglecting to show you affection or giving you the quiet treatment are examples of emotional neglect.


You might lose your sense of privacy if you are constantly being monitored. Monitoring includes checking your messages, checking your social media, and attending the activities you’ve registered for.

Verbally berating

Abuse doesn’t have to be subtle to be abusive. Verbal assaults, mood swings, or outbursts of screaming can all be signs of stress.

10 telltale indicators that you’ve been emotionally abused

You may be able to discern emotional abuse in someone else if you take the time to examine your own conduct.

If you see any of these symptoms, you may be the victim of emotional abuse.

  • Reluctance to interact with others. You’re not interacting with people because you’re feeling socially isolated.
  • Having a hard time believing in oneself. Self-doubt or a feeling of inadequacy might set in.
  • Fear. Walking on eggshells is a way of living in which you avoid speaking or doing anything that can set off an emotional response in others.
  • Changing one’s behavior to meet the needs of others. Despite your wishes, you alter your look or hobbies.
  • Having to relinquish your self-identity. You stop doing things you enjoy.
  • Dependency or codependency. You begin to doubt your own abilities.
  • The ability to have one’s say and be heard. When it comes to decisions that effect both of you, you aren’t involved in making them.
  • Shame. Your self-worth is a source of guilt or anxiety.
  • Physical transformations. Sleeping, eating, or weight routines may have changed.
  • Suffering from a mental illness. Depression and other mental health issues plague you.

What should I do next?

Emotional abuse may have a wide range of impacts, depending on the circumstances of the victim. The effects of emotional abuse from a parent, for example, may differ from those of abuse from a romantic partner.

How emotionally abused you are may also differ according to your own resources and support system.

Support is available if you believe you are the victim of abuse in your relationship. A variety of options are available for handling the problem.

Speaking with a mental health professional may be beneficial regardless of the sort of emotional abuse you’ve endured.

You can learn how to deal with stress and how to create healthy limits. Your mental and emotional well-being may be protected by establishing limits.

Let’s review

Abuse is defined as any behavior that has the goal of controlling, overpowering, or harming the victim. From love partners to family members to friends to coworkers, it may come from anybody.

It’s possible that emotional abuse is more subtle, but it still has the potential to undermine your feeling of self-worth and empowerment over time. Even if you think you’re to blame for the emotional abuse you’ve suffered, it’s never your fault.

Abuse of one’s emotions might be difficult to recognize. A person’s abusive conduct may not be obvious, but you may be able to spot certain changes in your own behavior.

You may be experiencing emotional abuse if you feel withdrawn, useless, or afraid. It is possible to leave an abusive environment and to heal. If you’ve been feeling isolated, know that you’re not. You deserve to be treated with respect and compassion.

Fernanda Avila

Fernanda Avila is a freelance writer who's passionate about providing accurate and helpful mental health content for readers. She believes sharing information can help raise awareness and improve society wellbeing.

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Back to top button